Do I look like yesterday's cygnet?
The cheque's in the post (updated to: I BACS'd you six seconds ago.)
I won't come in your mouth.
We'll make sure you get any footage we film of your act.
Can be added this:
I had absolutely nothing to do with it. It's a genuine review from a punter - they have all these security checks and filters and sensors that flag up fake reviews, don't they, on Tripadvisor?