The Ballet Star Galactica

 Sarastro's Aria from The Magic Flute  #classicalbassbaritone#bassbaritone#themagicflute#mozart#classicalsinging 

    Bored and fearful during the run up to filling in my tax return, I thought I'd have a bit of fun... Are you confused , the Inland Revenue pamphlet wondered, about what constitutes being self-employed as opposed to employed? For your own self- elucidation we advise you to answer in writing the questions highlighted in the enclosed pamphlet with specific reference to your last  completed paid employment.  Your answers should be written in ink.        I was actually planning on blood, but if you insist.    Yes to the following constitutes being employed :     Can someone tell you where to work, when to work, how to      work or what to do?                Not since I got the restriction order on my mother, no.      Everything further in this section was a ‘pass’, so I moved on.       Regarding your last completed paid employment did someone other than yourself hire you to do the work?       Yes.         If you answered ‘yes’ to the above, by whom were you hired to do the work?  

  Just been to check the horses. The stallion's walking around as ever looking terribly pleased with itself. #bass-baritone #strauss #classicalsinging 

  Chasing opera dreams again means going legit. Queeny O'Shaugnessy in her Blackpool B and B would have something to say. I stayed with her for the Showzam Festival. ‘And I shan’t kid you, kid,’ Queeny said, booking me in over the phone. ‘It is a greasy spoon with rooms. Don’t expect any of your ensuite this or sachets of chocolate that or distressed drawers the other. I’ll have Pledged, Swiffered and Toilet Ducked right round your bend – but no chocolate on the pillow. Though turning in I guarantee you’ll still be full up from the egg and sausage barm I dished you up that morning, if not the previous. Mellow Birds cupped bottomless. If I find you can ply draft excluders fastidious, I’ll jug you a kipper. ‘My mother, God find a refuge from her, ran a bed and half board up nearer Stanley Park than she warranted. In those days her gaff were certainly called ‘legit’. You’d never have been let in. It were for actors, classical musicians – no variety turns. John Mills’s f

  When the committee chair asks about your dietary requirements, then gets passive-aggressive about them... 'We've had quite the trial as you're non-dairy veggishistic. Menu option after menu option from my poor bedraggled - mustn't say lowly - village hall committee handmaidens defunct. Amanda's plainest consommé - that would otherwise sing with its going to table splunge of non-pasteurised fuller-fat-than-you'd-ever-suspect Guernsey cream enriched mascarpone. And what price leaving out the dolcelatte bind and yak's yoghurt drizzle from Beth's vegan offal sharing platter? Not to mention that Katrin's traditional paella fails to cajole without its hand of Giant Finn MacCunhaill's crumbling of gouged from between the trotters gelatin swole gelding's testicle steeped Caerphilly cheese. They're needing outreach support. Luckily, the touring scheme is of necessity insured for all fall out from incoming fusspot dietary requirements.

                                                       c. Laura Pink Photography      For Lewisham it was an otherwise quiet evening. So, I went next door to remonstrate with whoever was endlessly strimming. He was handsome, forties, bit of a belly, nicely tucked under beanie. Mowing, actually, outside what had been the Salvation Army old people's hostel. I did the English thing of staring, hands hovering midway to hips, brows in full sardon. 'Sir, yes?' he said. Absolutely self-assured. I bevelled and pretended I wanted to borrow the lawn mower. 'Are you in the harpist's flat?' he asked. I nodded. I'm staying here till my new flat has floors. 'How do you know her?' Suspicious. Did he think I might have broken in, thought I'd mow the lawn, failed to find a mower, conveniently heard one being plied outside...? 'Singing cabaret at the Aldeburgh Festival', I said, then gave myself some site-specific context. 'Whe