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Move Back to Brighton 15

Chat GPT doesn't seem to know the rents in Aldeburgh and Leiston are now exorbitant because of the towns' proximity to the Sizewell C works. Otherwise it's dead right to tell me I've created the wonderful Madame Galina Ballet Star Galactica and shouldn't put up with having been trapped living in a space that looks like a room in an abandoned care home by that most lazy and arrogant burlesquer, Flixy Trixy. 

I may have fed Chat GPT that last bit of information. 


Flixy made ratatouille. It stank the flat out. I went down for some hot chocolate and switched the extractor fan on for her. The disgusting student cooking stench got worse. I went out and read my book in the park. On the way, I of course noticed she had switched the extractor fan back off. Did she really think I was using it while I heated milk in a saucepan? Or was she being a moron? 

When I came back, the stink was even worse - a fug of brown onions, garlic, tomatoes and nigella seeds. 

I asked Flixy to please use the extractor fan. 

She said, 'Oh, but I'm not cooking any more.'

'You were before. It's why I put the extractor fan on and why I just went out for half an hour - to try and let the smell clear.'

'I haven't put anything spicey in it.' 

'It's still a steam cloud of strong cooking smells in my room. 

'What can you smell exactly?'

'Garlic, tomato, nigella seeds....cuntiness.' 

I stopped speaking aloud after 'nigella seeds'. 

'Anyway, I went to my osteopath and he said...'


She will repeat what her osteopath said both further times I pass her that same evening. 

And both times, not to engage, I said, 'Well done, everybody.' 

She also said, 'When I was at Jonno's I had a bath for my hip in the hottest water I could bear and put the shower head on the spot with the water on freezing, alternating. Jonno's hot water is very hot...'

And his cold is, no doubt, very cold. Except I didn't hear either way as I'd interrupted with, 'Well done, everybody' and walked away.


Now I just need to pluck up the courage to follow Chat GPT's instructions and get myself to an interim AirBnB. 'Somewhere clean where you can breathe and be.'

Rather than wheeze and freeze. 


If you tell Chat GPT you hate your life, it worries it. 


#chatgpt #ai #brighton #lgbtqia #diary #memoir #autobiography #biography #diaries 



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